Monday, June 23, 2008

Week 3

It is wonderful to be here in Rwanda and experience something new and exciting each and every day!

This week was jam pack full of stuff like English classes, Orphanage visits, Children's home, construction at a local church, VBS, card projects and sickness!

So where to begin....English classes will be finished this week and then we begin traveling to different areas here in Africa! It should be loads of fun! Every day for English class we have a fun time trying to explain the different words that individuals come up with or that we try and teach them. At times it can be very slow going but always rewarding when you see the recognition on their faces...it is so wonderful!

Children's Home
The children homes here in Rwanda are different than in the states because hundreds of kids can be in an out in a matter of months. Each child is more than likely an orphan due to AIDs or the genocide. Everyone here has a family member or several family members who lost their lives in the genocide. While we were at the children's home we just loved on kids and played games with them...we brought a parachute from YIM and the kids LOVED it! I never saw so many kids, so very happy to see a parachute and the games they could come up with were amazing!

Kicukiro Church
This was our first construction project at a local church. Most of the time we travel to rural churches for projects but this week we staying in the area where we worked in the city. The church wanted to build a school/orphanage for the local children but they had HUGE holes in the back near the church so we filled the holes for them! It was hard going cause the tools weren't the greatest but we got the job done!

VBS @ Remera
This is the local church near our compound! It is actually right in our back yard! So we held a VBS for about 20 kids on Saturday in the afternoon! Kids are so wonderful! They all made me smile! Our team told the story of Zacheous...I know my spelling is off, so I will blame the keyboard! :)

My favorite story from the whole week came at such an unexpected time...We are hitting the half way point and I am getting hit with many terrors! It happens every time I travel but it was really hitting me hard yesterday! To the point where I almost had a panic attack...There were so many thoughts going through my head....so i will try to describe all of the things i was going through...

My heart has always been drawn to international work and yet at times...I am very unsure of what God really wants me to do! Always though I have felt comfortable in foreign countries and with the people...I always seem to fall in love with the people and culture of wherever I may be! This time it was really hitting me hard though...I never felt anxiety or depression by being here...although several thoughts kept coming in about the future and things in my life...It terrifies me to think that I will be a senior this next year and the idea of having to make a decision about what I will do in my life scares me.

I want so very much to live out of a backpack and travel the world serving God's people! But to do that I need money and right now I also need to graduate from college! Also, I have an amazing boyfriend whom I care about deeply! He is wonderful! So the devil was really hitting me hard with worries about home and things here as well! There is such a need for the people of Rwanda and yet, I can't do anything for any of them! I can only pray but it seems so small and little in my mind!

This all happened Sunday, I was trying to ask God to give me some sign in my being here and the things I am doing! But nothing came...we left for church and i was still really unsettled by everything that was going on in my mind...but i could do nothing about it. I was just really uneasy about a lot of things...

then during the service a little girl was sitting in front of me and i wanted to so badly to get her to smile because she had the saddest look on her face...I love kids and my heart is so open to kids and when they hurt, I hurt as well...it did not seem to be going anywhere with this little girl but all of a sudden she looked back at me with the biggest smile on her face...it melted my heart....I was so excited that she had actually smiled at me! Then our group had to go up and introduce ourselves to the whole congregation at the church...it is pretty standard for us now! When I was going back to my seat the little girl was waiting for me at my row...she wanted to come and sit with me...it made me want to cry and I had this overwhelming sense of calm when I saw her...she came to sit on my lap and our interpreter who was sitting next to me asked what the little girls name was and she said...Peace. Once I heard her name...I knew GOD had given me a sign...he sent me a little angel in the form of a little African girl. He knows exactly what I needed and I was so calm after that moment that I am reassured of what God is doing in my life!

So I may not know what the future holds but I know who holds the future and that is ALL that matters!

3 comments:

Erin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Erin said...

Oh My Goodness! Gustave is so big! I miss them so much.

Brian told me about your blog and I thought I would check it out. I went to the DR Congo last year with Milly and Agnes and it was one of the best experiences of my life. I grew so much from that trip.

I totally understand where you are coming from when you were talking about how your not sure what God wants you to do. I was a junior last year when I went with YIM to DR Congo and I was super scared/excited about my senior year. It's like there's a giant cliff ahead and I definitely still do not want to jump. (I graduate in December.) I also have an amazing boyfriend (soon to be fiance) and it was really hard for me to figure out what God was telling me to do, especially when I came back to the States. I always thought to myself, what about my boyfriend? Can I still do God's will and have him too? I felt called to missions in Africa but when I went on YIM I wasn't sure anymore. I just knew I wasn't called to live a comfortable life. You know the 2 car garage life? I knew that wasn't for me. I still know it. I want to be among the poverty stricken and diseased. God finally let me in on what I should do next to prepare myself for the work I'm going to do. He let me know at the END of this year. Everything seems to be working out just fine even though I still don't know everything that God has in store for my life. I ALWAYS seem to forget that everything will be okay if I just wait and listen. I can't seem to get it through my hard head, even now.

It's really hard being stuck in the States and seeing everyone traveling to other countries and not just the ones on YIM. I tell myself, "Just buy a plane ticket and go somewhere," but I can't. Right now, I feel stuck at the crossroads I just want to GO! I'm so anxious to leave and do God's work. But I know that God is telling me to be patient and wait for my turn again. It's a long, hard road but it's a crazy ride.

I just felt like I should share some of my story with you. I'll be praying for you. I can't wait to read more of your blog!

I hope you're having an awesome time in Rwanda. I'm praying for the Rwanda team as well!

God Bless!

-Erin Perry

Anonymous said...

Hey! I saw the link for your blog on Stacie Eberhard's facebook group, and i just wanted to thank you for sharing! The story about the little girl named Peace gave me chills and what a wonderful reminder for God's graciousness and compassion =).... I too am very like-minded as far as not being sure about where or when but being called to live the 'american dream/normal' life. God Bless you and your team in Rwanda!