Thursday, July 10, 2008

Top 10 Ways to Die on a Road Trip to Burundi

1. Be stupid enough to get on a public charter bus.
2. Flying off seat and into uncovered metal pieces on other seats (crazy turns and no seat belts don't help this at all).
3. Smelling the puke of the carsick person next to you.
4. Get hit in the head with falling luggage from overhead racks.
5. Get into a fist-fight at the border with the people who cut in front of you.
6. Fall into squatty potty at the border crossing that you paid 100 francs to use.
7. Self-inflicted wound due to being forced to watch African music videos for hours on end (they're all the same, and they're all TERRIBLE!).
8. Snap spinal cord from 3 hours of giving the "I don't care" nod to the African next to you who wants to practice their English.
9. Stepping on live chickens napping in the back of the bus and getting feet clawed off.
10. Have your eardrums be blown out by bus horn that sounds like a dying elephant.

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